Once Works Well was pure technology. Now it seeks merely to divert.
Pansy subjects - Verse! Opera! Domestic trivia! - are now commonplace.
The 300-word limit for posts is retained. The ego is enlarged

Monday, 21 November 2011

As winter beckons...

Antipathies – with reasons

Music: Berlioz (Edgy, unsettling, unmelodious). Verdi operas (Cumbersome, self-regarding, self-referential, over-Italianate). Rossini (Virtuosic, heartlessly rhythmic, predictable).

Authors: Priestley (Professionally Yorkshire, egotistical, banal). Roth – later titles (Insubstantial, depressing, narrow scope). Byatt (Pedestrian, literary, long)

Sports: Soccer (Tribal, morally corrupt, unfunny). Ice hockey (Puck too small, confrontational, crowded). Speedway (Brief, unvarying, dirty).

Wine: Bordeaux - petits chateaux (Tannic, cheerless, pretentious). Beaujolais (Trivial, mouldy gamay grape, vegetable bouquet). Sauvignon blanc – barring expensive rarities (Indistinguishable, shallow, dental dangers).

Painters: Emin (Potentially fraudulent, fashionable, childish). Stubbs (Limited subjects, inaccurate, exaggerated). Gauguin (Implausible, inelegant, racist).

Politicians: Chirac (Self-serving, poor teeth, smokes too much). Osborne (Bee-sting mouth, unskilful liar, miniaturised). Johnson (Disguised extremist, self-loving, failed comic).

TV series: The Office (Ugly central character, parodies the unparodiable, sly). Morse (Phony accent, phony intellect, phony beers). Anything-watch (Dumbed, gushing, condescending).

Towns: Guildford (Excessive health, cornflake box cathedral, airs and graces). Dover (Xenophobic, filthy, unwelcoming). Niagara (Smelly industry, disappointing attraction, forgettable)

Actors: Alec Baldwin (Abrupt, uncongenial, slab-sided). Mayall (Monotonous, febrile, thin). Hawn (Repetitive, unskilled, irritating)

Blogs: Works Well (Opinionated, casual, sour).

NOTE. Anyone thinking of responding: conciseness (which I haven't managed everywhere) will tickle your fancy.

7 comments:

Hattie said...

I'm catching up on 30 Rock, watching episodes on my Kindle Fire. According to Tina Fay in her book, Bossypants, she insisted that Alec Baldwin had to play her boss. He's perfect in the role, because you know he is playing himself and he is too dumb to catch on.
I think you have picked out things that are fatally flawed. Roth is very limited, yes, but I can't get around him. I have never been to Niagara Falls, so I can't say anything about that. Byatt has her moments, but I prefer Drabble.
One of my blogger friends is saying that Almodovar is "unconvincing," so a rebellion against things that are good but not good enough must be going around.
This is not the same as just plain bad stuff, like Franzen's Freedom.
I'm a little tired of today's atmosphere around books, celebrities, travel and so on, which is mostly hype.
My husband suggest that every generation should destroy all the art, music, and literature of the past and start all over again. Give every kid a flute, a pencil and paper, and a lump of clay.

Julia said...

Berlioz is the Beaujolais of composers.

Rouchswalwe said...

Beer: Bud Light (Swillish, dank, torpid).

Occasional Speeder said...

Food - turkey (large beyond reason, dry, unjustly celebrated)

Barrett Bonden said...

All: Bless you all for getting the idea. Actually, picking three appropriate yet different adjectives is quite a discipline.

Hattie: There is something about AB (perhaps his lack of an upper lip) that makes him unbearable to look at. Also his body is the very shape of smugness.

You've done very well considering this was a list very much slanted towards British culture. It is also, inevitably, personal. I am a great Almodovar fan but I wouldn't start sending faeces-filled envelopes to the person who finds him "unconvincing"

I would link your fourth and fifth paragraphs together. One reason for not enjoying Franzen is because of the "atmosphere" he attracts. As a result I find him overrated.

Your husband's proposal is the most radical I have ever heard but in the Works Well house there are many mansions. If self-generated criticism (in the old meaning of the word; not just slamming) is to be reborn perhaps this is the way to go.

Julia: Go to the top of the class. There you'll find a glass of Vosne-Romanée and an MP3 player uttering K622.

RW (zS): You've let your outraged feelings get ahead of your word selection: swillish and dank are too close in meaning. But 9/10 for passion.

OS: May I try and improve a little? Unreasonably large, dry, overrated. As I say and as you can check from some of my feebies, it's a tough act.

The Crow said...

Raw oysters (snottish)

Occasional speeder said...

For some reason 'overated' just could not be found in my brain when I posted. You are spot on and lets celebrate the fact by making sure - once again - 'big bird' is rejected at our Christmas for something far more tasty.